Bobby Valentino - Valentino, Bobby (R&B) (CD 2005)

The mass influx of male R&B singers populating the airwaves today has become the norm anything new. There s dozens of young men entering the music game who try to walk the fine line of emulating their idols while establishing their own style and sound and gaining massive popularity, success, and approval in the process. In a nutshell; male R&B singers aren t anything new. Newcomer Bobby Valentino isn t anything new either.

Bobby Valentino is nothing more than a lukewarm rehash of someone better we ve seen and heard somewhere else sometime before. On his eponymous debut, released through Ludacris imprint Disturbing Tha Peace, Bobby makes his bid to be the next big thing in male R&B by playing the tried-but-true role of the sensitive thug. If the role is played properly, it can achieve one quite a bit of success. A sensitive thug can win points with both the ladies and the fellas. Sadly, Bobby V. stumbles his way through his execution and unintentionally bores the hell outta everyone in the process.

What exactly does Bobby do wrong? There s 16 tracks and over an hour of music on this album. Out of that, there are only a handful of tracks where Bobby gets the formula right:

Lead single, Slow Down, is mellow, infectious and hypnotic. The percussive, ethereal backbeat is mesmerizing enough to make the ladies swoon while having enough thump to keep the fellas heads bobbing. So mesmerizing that the inane lyrical scheme - don t turn around cuz that pretty round thing looks good to me - is overlooked. A classic case of amplifying the strengths to downplay the weaknesses. Sadly, the Remix tacked on at the end slows down the song and unintentionally cheapens its effect. Give Me A Chance also benefits from its exotic production and better, though still not rocket science, lyricism. The album s sole cameo, Ludacris, also adds to the proceedings and gives the song a little more life.

2nd single, Tell Me, sounds like Slow Down done one better. The production adds a layer of etherealness along with an air of hypnotic intoxication that again effortlessly swoons the ladies and rocks the thugs. Bobby isn t an exceptional lyricist to begin with and his slight objectifying lyrics do grow stale after a while. But with such engaging production, it s a qualm easy to overlook. My Angel (Never Leave You) benefits from the mellow production and more heartfelt, less corporeal lyrics. A rather simple yet heartfelt love song goes a long way to help rectify the other song s indiscretions while giving the album a more genuine feel.

I ll Forgive You is probably the album s best moment because for 4:23, Bobby drops the sensitive thug persona and portrays himself as a genuinely hurt man. The backing production, for a change, does it job and supports, instead of overshadowing, Bobby as he voices how he s willing to restart a failed relationship despite being hurt by the woman he loves. The regret, reluctance, and pain are shaded quite well in Bobby s vocals and prove that if he recorded more material of this caliber, he d actually stand a chance of separating himself from the crowd. Album closer, One Girl To Love, works for many of the same reasons as I ll Forgive You does. The production supports without overshadowing, Bobby shows some genuine emotion in his voice and the lyricism sounds more heartfelt than a collection of cheap pick-up lines.

And that s it for the highlights of the record. I can t recall but I don t think I ve ever had to say this about an album; a track-by-track would be useless because it would be repetitive and redundant. It really would be boring, just like Bobby s album. The rest of his album all blends together into one lackluster amalgam of music that serves no better purpose than mellow background music.

The sex you tracks are interspersed with the make love tracks, true enough, but none of the songs have a distinctive element to make them stand apart. Lyrically, either Bobby uses tired pick-up lines (Gangsta Love, Come Touch Me) as a thug would or he uses his weapons of mass seduction to whisper pillow talk and sweet nothings in a sensitive fashion (Never Lonely, Want You To Know Me, Love Dream, Lights Down Low) and fails on both counts.

Tim & Bob, who helm most of the album s production, did a fairly well job of spicing the production up on the album s highlights but resort to recycling rehashing boring, mellow R&B moods for the rest of the material, thus giving the sound a stunted feel. The 1 true up tempo of the record, Come Touch Me, is the only track to fare well since it bites an unaccredited hip-hop tune and creates a bouncy knock that overshadows the song s inane insufficiencies.

And Bobby isn t a terribly strong vocalist but that only shows when he tries to extend his range or put some soul into his vocals. Or when he puts on an extremely annoying falsetto, as he does on Love Dream, that sounds like his bedroom partner put a little too much pressure on his right testicle. Or when the songs stretch on unnecessarily. Which leads me to another qualm about this record; the length.

The album isn t overlong because of the bloated track listing. It s overlong because the bloated track listing thinks it s better than it is. Most of the songs on the record are self-indulgent and stretch on because they sound good to the powers that be, and to Bobby who in turn thinks the extended lengths help his sensitive thug prowess sweep the ladies off their feet and keep them there. But do we really need to hear the chorus repeated 4 times followed by a 1:00+ instrumental postlude? I think not. Bobby Valentino isn t terribly talented and his music isn t terribly engaging so the extended lengths only highlight more reasons not to purchase this album.

Plain and simple, as I said, Bobby Valentino is a lukewarm rehash of someone better we ve seen and heard somewhere else sometime before. That being said, Bobby V. isn t worth paying much attention to. There s more talented people out there who have played, and play, the role of the sensitive thug much better than he.

As the original title of his album requested, all Bobby wanted was to be given a chance. And so I gave him one. But after listening to this project, I doubt I ll give him another one.

Price Listing:
1. Some Bobby ($.00)
2. Slow Down* ($2.25)
3. Give Me A Chance* feat. Ludacris ($2.50)
4. Never Lonely ($.50)
5. Mista Valentino (Interlude) ($.00)
6. Tell Me* ($2.50)
7. My Angel (Never Leave You)* ($2.50)
8. Want You To Know Me ($.50)
9. Gangsta Love ($.99)
10. Come Touch Me ($.99)
11. I ll Forgive You ($2.50)
12. Love Dream ($.00)
13. Lights Down Low ($.00)
14. One Girl To Love* ($2.25)
15. Thank You Lord (Outro) ($.00)
16. Slow Down (Remix) ($.50)

Whisperscream s Inflated Dollars & Sense
Retail Price: $14.98
Album Worth: $17.98

REAL WORLD CURRENCY CONVERTER:

$10 or less......Avoid at all costs (unless a fan of aural masochism)

$10-15......Best cautiously borrowed from a friend

$15-20......If you re that curious, the bootleg will suffice

$20-25......Download It. Get It Used. Otherwise, Pass.

$25-30......Worthy of a paid download or a good buy if on sale

$30-35......The best pop album of 2005 is worth owning, right?

$35-40......Own at all costs

$40+......You don't own this because

Great Music to Play While: downloading the best song, Check List , left off the album