Almost Famous - Lumidee (CD 2003)

The Main Idea:
Lumidee came out of nowhere this past summer with her ridiculously catchy song Never Leave You & the remix with Busta & Fabolous. The song was so catchy that nobody paid any attention to the fact that Lumidee can t sing. They just anxiously went & bought her album on the catchy song alone. I know that 99.999% of those who did buy it were extremely disappointed. Thankfully, I wasn t one of them. A friend of mine bought it and told me that it was so good and that I had to hear it so she let me borrow it. Below is a track-by-track review of how bad it really is.

1. Almost Famous - This is just an intro by Lumidee s producer DJ Tedsmooth. Very unnecessary. 0/10.

2. Honestly - This track is like most tracks on the album, very short at just 2:41. The beat is very weak and Lumidee s voice has absolutely no range or depth whatsoever. Jennifer Lopez is a better singer than her and that says a lot. And if you think the lyrics are familiar, it s because they are. The lyrics to this song are exactly the same as the ones to Never Leave You. WOW Lumidee. You must be really talented if two of your songs have the same lyrics. I d love to pick your brain (I m being sarcastic). Bad track, plain and simple. 1/10.

3. Crashin A Party feat. N.O.R.E - The album s 2nd single and the wanna-be party track. The beat needs life support to get a party started and the lyrics are very boring:

I feel like crashin a party, V.I.P dont try to stop me
You can like my style but don t copy, ladies let me know if you got me

N.O.R.E. isn t the greatest rapper but he does save the track from being completely dreadful. If the beat was better, the song would be hotter. 2/10.

4. Never Leave You (Uh Oooh Uh Oooh) - Lumidee s big hit which Lumidee says is off-key as if we didn t notice. The song blew up airwaves thanks to its incorporation of the Diwali rhythm made popular by Sean Paul & Wayne Wonder. Everyone knew the song but not the singer thus the album title, ALMOST FAMOUS. I liked the song when the 1st 1,000,000 times I heard it but it got played until the words came off the record. I ll like it a few months or years down the line when I haven t heard it in quite some time. Lumidee, you better be thankful for this song. VERY THANKFUL. 7/10.

5. For Keeps - Lumidee can t sing so she got the bright idea to show us her rapping skills since she s a self-proclaimed rapper. She s not the worst but she s not the best. Her & Nick Cannon are about neck-and-neck. It s still not enough to save this sinking ship. One of DJ Tedsmooth s better beats but it s still nothing special. Lumidee basically tells this guy that he and her could be a couple if they just get together and try. I don t know why the song is called For Keeps since the words are mentioned nowhere in the song but I guess you have to read between the lines.

6. Go With Me feat. Handsome Joe - Lumidee decides to rap a whole song and sing the hook. When you try to combine two talents you don t really posess, it equals a bad combination. The song isn t horrible but if I had to choose, she s a better rapper than singer. She has a few good lines here and there. Handsome Joe isn t a good rapper either but he s better than Lumidee. 5/10.

7. Only For Your Good - The only track not produced by DJ Tedsmooth. Buckwild s beat is OK but the hook is extremely irritating. The verses aren t bedazzling either. Too many words wasted on this track. Moving on. 0/10.

8. Suppose To Do - Although the CD jacket doesn t state it, this song is an interlude. It s a hybrid of rapping/spoken word/singing. The beat is OK. It s kind of a bootleg, independent hip-hop ryde or die beat. I like the lyrics:

I see light as a blur so what is your concern? Ain t nothing coming free, now this one day I learned
I m playing with the fire cause I m looking for the burn,
Now help is on the way cause I feel that I have earned
I m trying not to sweat, live with no regrets, ain t feeling what I m doing but you gimme my respect Some days I wanna write, hit the block then I m tight
Stacks other bullsh!t, no words to feed the mic

They re the deepest on the record but Lumidee has the audacity to interpolate the Mahogany theme (DO YOU KNOW?) into this song. Lumidee, you went too far. You ve murdered your own songs, don t massacre someone else s. 5/10.

9. Air To Breathe - The beat is dull and the lyrics aren t very exciting. Lumidee basically says that she has to leave the relationship. She has to find new air to breathe. I like the new air to breathe part. I ll use that. Thanks for a new clich in my clich book Lu. 4/10.

10. My Last Thug - THE ONLY, DARE I SAY, GOOD SONG ON THIS RECORD. The beat isn t the best but is probably the best on the CD. Lumidee raps again but this is her best rap although she s no extraordinary anything. I hate to say it but I like this song. Lumidee basically talks about her man who is a thug and how although thugs are no good for men, she loves him and she then asks God that if He lets her have her man, it will be her last thug. Lyrics:

I don't really wanna tell ya lies but it's hard for me to say that I ve cried at night and held my pillow tight And I pray to the Lord that if he make this right
I swear you let me have him, this'll be my last one, I swear u let me have him, this'll be my last thug
I swear you let me have him, this'll be my last one, I swear u let me have him, this'll be my last thug

The song is actually tolerable. Lumidee, take note. If you re privileged to make another CD, every song should follow this one s blueprint. But don t let this little praise go to your head. 10/10.

11. Break Away - Lumidee tells her man that she has to break away from him to find herself. The weak piano-driven beat supports the longest track on the CD which drags on for an agonizing 5:41. Thankfully, 1:31 is instrumental. But then we re treated to a little poem by Lumidee. It s OK but I think it s one of those poems that attempts to be deep and profound but tries too hard and comes off shallow.

12. Me & You - Another short masterpiece at 2:47. Lumidee tells her man that she ll gladly stay by his side no matter what anyone says. The piano in it seems very fake and makes the beat boring just like the whole CD. 1/10.

13. Uh Oooh Remix feat. Busta Rhymes & Fabolous - The remix is way better than the original and Lumidee owes every ounce of her success to those 2 for making people willing to buy this junk. Busta & Fab s rhymes are crazy. The best way to end the album. Leave your listeners happy and thankful (that the horror is over).

Final Thoughts:
There are so many things wrong with this CD. 1st of all, it s too short at 41:12. Lumidee can t sing, she s not the greatest rapper and her songwriting skills aren t very original. She needs to ditch Tedsmooth and get a producer with real talent. The only good song on this whole thing is THUG and even that one is kinda mediocre at best. So far, the CD has sold about 210,000 copies and I think that out of 210,000, maybe 7-10 like this CD including my friend. She hyped this CD so much but never believe hype. Investigate for yourself and determine how good it is for yourself. In my opinion, Lumidee almost has talent and her CD was almost good but don t you listen? Brandy already told us; ALMOST DOESN T COUNT!!!!!!

Great Music To Play While: KICKING YOURSELF IN THE BUTT FOR SPENDING MONEY ON THIS CRAP