The Philadelphia Story (2000, DVD)

If you watch this movie, even the possibility of such boredom becomes unimaginable. The move is, of course, The Philadelphia Story starring Katherine Hepburn, Cary Grant, and James Stewart. Oddly enough, Hepburn was deep in a period of unpopularity among movie makers because of her difficulty to work with. Even here, she had originally asked for Clark Gable for the Cary Grant role, and Spencer Tracy for the Jimmy Stewart role.

If it hadn't been for contractual conflicts, she might have got them. It would have been an entirely different movie if she had because Clark Gable didn't like "Ladies' Director" (euphemism for Gay) George Cukor and even got him fired from Gone With The Wind. Tracy would have undoubtedly been good in the Stewart role, but Jimmy did well enough to win an Oscar anyhow!

Although it was no secret that Cukor was Gay, neither was it a secret that he was one of the most talented and capable Directors in Hollywood. He was popular with leading ladies, and so attractive to women that Samuel Goldwynn's wife had such a strong unrequited love for him that she had her grave placed next to his in the cemetery!

For all the controversy and gossip, Cukor's greatness began showing early, and included such genuine classics as Dinner at Eight, Little Women, David Copperfield, Romeo and Juliet with Leslie Howard, John Barrymore, and Norma Shearer and Camille with Robert Taylor and Greta Garbo. There were many, many more, including a total of nine (9) made with Hepburn as Leading Lady, but you get the general idea.

Hepburn plays Tracy Samantha Lord, divorced wife of C.K. Dexter Haven, played by Cary Grant. It was generally understood that writers Philip Barry (Play and screenplay), Donald Ogden Stewart and Waldo Salt collaborating on the screenplay (Salt without credits) patterned the character of Tracy after Hepburn's reputation at the time.

Stewart plays Macaulay (Mike) Connor, a magazine writer who has been unwillingly drafted to do a story on Tracy's upcoming marriage to George Kittredge, played perfectly by John Howard. You may remember Howard as Ronald Coleman's brother in Lost Horizon or as Bulldog Drummond in a series of the popular "B" detective films. Like WWII Hero Stewart, Howard distinguished himself in WWII, taking command of his badly damaged minesweeper when the Captain was killed, even diving into the water to save a wounded sailor. For his heroism and gallantry, Howard won the Navy Cross and the Legion of Merit.

The plot is, and follow me closely here, Grant is mad at Hepburn and wants her marriage publicized against her wishes and those of her Philadelphia Society family. He introduces Stewart and his photographer sidekick Elizabeth (Liz) Imbrie (played by Ruth Hussey) as friends of Society friends. The subterfuge is discovered by the family who try to create an image that would make any story unbelievable. In the meantime, Stewart starts to fall for Hepburn, who doesn't really love Howard, and Hussey becomes irresistable to Uncle Willie played by Roland Young. As this is going on, precocious daughter Dinah -- in the person of Virginia Wiedler, is subtly trying to help Grant break up the pending wedding to Howard. See what a clear plot it is?

The interactions and the absolutely priceless mugging by Hepburn (you have to see it to believe how hilarious this woman can be), combined with some of the most deliciously sophisticated dialogue ever written make this a farcial romance that will elicit guffaws from everyone who sees it, and that will have some of you literally rolling on the floor with laughter.

Aside from some of my favorite muggings, there is the scene in which Hepburn is trying to explain Philadelphia Society to a coldly rigid writer, Stewart. "Philadelphia is a strange place, generally noted for its historic relics. By the way, how old did you say you were?" Which dig flys right over Stewart's coldly rigid head.

Or, when things are getting more than usually chaotic and Tracy is feeling the chaos. "I'm going crazy. I'm standing here solidly on my own two hands and going crazy." Or, hung-over Uncle Willie commenting on his condition; "Awwww, this is one of those days that the pages of history teach us are best spent lying in bed!"

Or, when Stewart is about to get slugged by Howard, and Grant hits him first. When he comes to, the exchange runs, Stewart Golly. Why did you hit me? Grant It seemed like a good idea to hit you before George did. He's in better shape than I.

I hate trying to quote scintillating dialogue because all the bubbles seem to evaporate in putting it down in black and white. Actually, you'll understand better when you see this film for yourself, and I just know you will. I mean, after all, when a film of this stature is available not only on the classic TV channels, but on VHS and DVD, it would be bordering on cretinism not to see it, wouldn't it?

In short, see it, enjoy it, and remember who all but pushed you into it. I'm fully intending this review to motivate you, and that motivation to count toward any and all needed redemption of my soul in the hereafter, so don't let me down!