Ten Summoner's Tales - Sting (CD 1993)

Everyone has their pretentious buddy. The guy you can't help but respect because of their intelligence, but can'6t stand at times because he KNOWS how intelligent he is. Either that, or he's one of those unfortunate ones who thinks he's smarter than he really is. It's a definite love/hate relationship, and not many musicians are loved/hated more than the former schoolteacher who his momma calls Gordon Sumner, but everyone knows as Sting.

Let's take a look at this album, his fourth studio album since leaving The Police at the end of the "Synchronicity" tour in 1983. The title, "Ten Summoner's Tales", is a play on words involving Chaucer's "Canterbury Tales" (I'm not a literary guy, I had to look that one up), Sting's last name, and the amount of songs on the album (there's actually 11-but one's entitled "Epilogue" so the album title makes sense). If that's not hardcore snooty pretentiousness, I don't know what is.

But in most cases, Sting has managed to make the highbrow attitude work fr him. While enjoying tremendous success since The Police broke up in the mid-Eighties, Sting's music had often been criticized for being just a bit too serious. A lot of folks felt he was singing with his nose pointed up at everyone. His first solo album, "The Dream Of The Blue Turtles" was a heavy-handed attempt to cast Sting as a "serious" musician, using talented backup players from the jazz world. "...Nothing Like The Sun" had upbeat moments like "We'll Be Together" and "Englishman In New York", but most folks remember the downbeat songs like "Fragile" and "The Dance Alone". 1991's "Soul Cages" was a loose concept album about the death of his father and, well, you get the idea. By the time "Tales" was released in 1993, the general message from Sting's fans was "Lighten the hell up already!"

So lighten up he did, and "Tales", in my opinion, ranks as my second favorite Sting album of all time (following "Brand New Day"). The upbeat tunes are loose and playful, the ballads are beautiful and engaging, and Sting doesn't seem to be writing and performing with the creases of worry in his forehead, although he's still reading too many damn books.

What do you get when you listen to this album?

Excellently crafted pop tunes, for one. "If I Ever Lose My Faith In You", the album's leadoff track and first single, is fresh and airy. I think the drums are live, but on this and a couple of other tracks, they're played to mimic the "shuffle" drum-loop that had become popular thanks to Soul II Soul in the early Nineties. On this song, Sting crafts a perfect declaration of undying love. He also takes a quick knock at politicians ("they all seem like...game show hosts to me"), but it's all in good fun. The jauntiness continues with the playful "She's Too Good For Me" and the album's closer, "Nothin 'Bout Me", where Sting and his band show off their jazzy chops (peppy horn section, breezy piano solo). The lyrics show Sting at his most teasing, asking a potential love interest to do a full-length background check on him ("Run my name through your computer/Mention me in passing to your college tutor..."). Placing "Faith" and "Nothin'" as the bookends of the album is a bit of a ruse, because to be truthful, "Tales" *is* ballad heavy, but even the ballads have a lighthearted quality that had been missing from Sting's music for quite a while.

While we're still in the land of easy-breezy, "Love Is Stronger Than Justice (The Munificent Seven)" is one of Sting's several forays into the land of the spaghetti western ("Fill Her Up" and "I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying" are others), as our man plays one of seven brothers travelling to Mexico to vanquich "Los Banditos" and ultimately vying for the chance at a single fair maiden. With some corny country guitar and the occasional exaggerated twang, it's close to being parody, but it's still an engaging, if not silly, song. "Saint Augustine In Hell", not one of the album's better songs, but has a humorous middle breakdown, where Sting finds himself in hell with...well, we'll let the lyrics tell it.

"Relax, have a cigar, make yourself at home. Hell is full of high court judges, failed saints. We've got Cardinals, Archbishops, barristers, certified accountants, music critics, they're all here. You're not alone, you're never alone. Not here you're not. Okay, break's over."

BA-ZING!!!

At any rate, the best moments on "Tales" occur when Sting slows the tempo and plays Lothario. Trudie must have given the man plenty of play after hearing this album's ballads. "Fields Of Gold", "It's Probably Me", "Seven Days", and "Shape Of My Heart" are among the most exquisite love songs in Sting's catalog, and all for various reasons. "Seven Days" has a weird time-signature and the most jazz-snobby vibe. It continues this album's trend of mildly humorous lyrics, including a nod to Police classics "Can't Stand Losing You" (the six-foot-10 boyfriend returns) and "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic" (he sings a snatch of it towards the end of the song). "Fields Of Gold" is one of those slow-motion, deeply passionate love songs that you can picture as someone's wedding song. Although the late Eva Cassidy did a bang-up job covering the song several years later, Sting's version, sung in his brooding, husky voice, is still the beautifully passionate version to beat. And how many pop songs make Northumbrian pipe solos sound good? (and no, I have no idea what those are, either).

My two favorite songs on the album are "Shape Of My Heart"-another aching ballad which uses a clever card-playing metaphor throughout the song's lyric without sounding cheesy, and the spare, hushed "It's Probably Me". "Shape" is pinned around a beautiful guitar part that has been sampled numerous times by R&B acts from Monica to Carl Thomas. As for "It's Probably Me", there's a version on a soundtrack somewhere (I think it's one of the "Lethal Weapon" films) that features some unnecessary guitar work by Eric Clapton. You should definitely stick with this album's Slowhand-free version. It's a simple song of devotion, but the devotion here is...sort of tentative? I don't think that's the right word, but it's the only word I could come up with. Check the lyrics and decide for yourself...

"You're not the easiest person I ever got to know/And it's hard for us both to let our feelings show/Some would say /I should let you go your way/You'll only make me cry
If there's one guy, just one guy/Who'd lay down his life for you and die/It's hard to say it/I hate to say it/But it's probably me"

Over the course of a solo career that has produced some classic material ("Brand New Day", "Nothing Like The Sun"), as well as some stone-cold duds (most of "Mercury Falling" and "Sacred Love"), "Ten Summoner's Tales" stands as one of Sting's all-around best efforts. While our man still occasionally falls into the trap of being too smart for his own good, he does remember to bring his musical and lyrical A-game with him. This album's songs rank among his most consistently memorable, and this album has virtually no "skip factor" (with the boring "Something The Boy Said" the only major exception). The public agreed, as "Tales" scored three hit singles, multi-platinum sales and a Grammy. If nothing else, this album is proof that Sting can crack a smile once in a while, even if he's still staring down his glasses at you.

Sting "Ten Summoner's Tales"

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Repeat: "Shape Of My Heart", "It's Probably Me", "Fields Of Gold"

Skip: "Something The Boy Said", "Saint Augustine In Hell"

Great Music to Play While: Heading over to the dictionary to find out what the hell "munificent" means.