Avalanche (DVD, 2001, The Actors' Series)

Roger Corman's attempt to cash in at the very end of the "Disaster Craze" of the 1970s has ROCK HUDSON playing a business tycoon (and looking VERY OLD while doing it) trying to cash in on his investment at a newly opened ski resort threatened by tons of snow. MIA FARROW is Rock's ex (now, her name isn't Phyllis), and desperately in search of Woddie Allen Script, does her best "I still think I am in the Great Gatsby Voice" while fooling around with a local ski bum. Toss in a young ROBERT FORSTER, and an ancient JEANETTE NOLAN, add ice, shake well, and you get "AVALANCHE"...a 1978 low-budget "Irwin Allen Road Company" disaster film that, if nothing else, features a clamity that Old Irwin DIDN'T try to do!
In fact, MANY people think that Irwin Allen DID direct this picture. Rather, it is veteran COREY ALLEN (no relation to Irwin) who does his best with grainy stock footage of actual avalanches, bad lighting, a mediocre script, and a Roger Corman budget.
I think Mystery Science Theater 3000 sums up Rorger Corman better than anyone else. Many people think he was a GENIUS. Many people think he was the "1st Quentin Tarantino". Many people think he was "ahead of his time. But I agree with the MST3K summation that "ROGER CORMAN STINKS."
And what surprises me is that Roger made QUITE A FORTUNE on his low budget flicks over the years. You would THINK, for a disaster flick, that he would have given SOMETHING of a budget for Corey Allen to work with. Instead, Allen does his best with what he is given and should be given ALL credit for making what amounts to be a "watchable feature" and a "must have for disaster film collectors."
The avalanche footage is impressive. The destruction scenes are well-staged, and the location scenery is pretty (although the whole picture looks like it was filmed thru a dirty window as it has such poor lighting!).
What is supposed to pass as "acting" is basically a hodge-podge of cliches, romantic trysts, and soap opera subplotting. An expecially big "EWWWW" goes to Rock Hudson with his shirt off! Kind of "icky" to think of anyway, but here he is in all his 60-year old-hairy chested-pot-bellied-glory (think "Harvey Fierstein in a speedo" and you get the picture).
As for Mia Farrow, the best that can be said about her performance is that it was better than her NEXT career-killer, 1979s "HURRICANE"...a Dino DeLaurentiis turkey...in which she pretty much assigned herself to the "Bad Actress Hall of Fame" and nailed the doors shut behind her. She sleepwalks her way thru what was meant to be a "sexy role", but the fact is...Mia just isn't that sexy to begin with. Mia manages to make SONDRA LOCKE look hot, and "coos" her words out like a baby dollm, in typical Farrow Fashion.
Res tof the cast is a veritable whos-who of B-Movie trivia. Jeanette Nolan, Rick Moses, Barry Primus and a not-yet-known Robert Forster look like they were trucked off the lot of a recent "Sasquatch" movie, or some Bert I. Gordon film and paid for 5 days worth of work, as they are simply on hand to round out the opening credits.
SO...make yourself a snowcone, turn the temperature in the house down to 50 degrees, pack your feet in ice cubes, and watch an "opening cartoon" of Frosty the Snowman (or better yet watch the insipid "Frosty's Winter Wonderland") and let HYPOTHERMIA slowly sink in, and you won't have to feel the pain of sitting thru 91 minutes of Roger Corman.
But what do I know? I mean, I DID buy this film!! :)