The Abandoned (DVD, 2007)

WARNINGS:
FULL NUDITY
GRAPHIC VIOLENCE
EXTREME ADULT LANGUAGE AND CONTENT

Well, this one was a total disappointment. I bought this DVD because I love horror movies - but NOT slasher movies, just stories that frighten.

This is not a slasher. It has some gore. Some goo. Weirdness but not too scary to me (so speaks the queen of terror).

The story of an American woman who discovers she has inherited abandoned properity in Siberia after 40 years, she goes there not to make a claim but to discover her REAL past. Once there, she finds her "twin" brother already in residence in the ramshackle house. A house, moreover, shut off from the rest of the world due to the bridge being down and it's being on an island.

Strange how she got there to begin with. When the bridge was already down. In a truck that hadn't run for 40 years.

Umm, yeah.

The movie has a few twists. Such as: things that have been decayed for 40 years suddenly coming to life and being as new (or trying to attack), hidey-holes within the house to get lost in, the two having visions of themselves (their dopplegangers) as they are soon to be...yeah, the dopplegangers are pretty creepy. And the pig scene is really gory but, then again, I don't like gore, I like creepy.

That lady is quite something using that big old gun, she makes the guy, her brother, look like a wimp! That's a plus. Kind of Sigourney Weaver without the looks or muscle.

The naked girl that shows up needs to lift some weights or something. Maybe go to the beach, get a tan, she's lookin' awfully blue. Stop leading guys off to get eaten by pigs, that's a no-no.

Even though I know some who deserved it, I can't recall ever leading some jerk off to my sty so my pigs could eat him. Wish I'd thought of it, though.

All in all, it's not worth the price of rental. I have higher hopes for some of it's beginning reviews of coming movies.

Hope I didn't insult anyone.


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